im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize