Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
