the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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