I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
