I think I just saw someone hide a body.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
