Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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