He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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