Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
