What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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