Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
