I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
