If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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