well most of my day revolves around power hour
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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