I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize