Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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