So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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