mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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