we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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