You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize