just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
