If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
he fucked my hip out of place.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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