Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I enjoy the company of your penis
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