I wish i was in the wii world.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
