It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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