Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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