So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
