So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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