??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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