i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare