Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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