Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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