What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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