i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize