i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize