It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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