i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize
