Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
