So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
