KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
