i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize