HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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