Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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