my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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