at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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