she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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