Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
