its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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