He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
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Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
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After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think