I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
