Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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