You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
