"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
