everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Randomize